Servant Leadership

 

Servanthood

Matthew 20:26-28 

"Whoever wants to become the greatest among you must be your servant, and whoever want to be first must be your slave- just as the Son of Man did not come to be served, but to serve, and to give his life as a ransom for many."  

      Jesus' teachings on servanthood have always bothered me. Not because I don't think He's right, but because its so stinking hard to do.
        What I love about the teaching is that it is so counter-cultural. I am an antagonist so I love times when Jesus acts against the culture and upsets the order of things. This is one of those teachings: the 1st shall be the last and the last shall be the 1st. He is totally re-arranging the social order; It's no longer the big-wigs who are the greatest, it's the lowest servants. I imagine that really torked off some of Jesus' listeners who had spent so much time and money trying to climb the social ladders of the day.
         But what bothers me about the teaching is that it reveals the true nature of my heart (and I would venture to say others' heart as well). When I'm really honest, I don't want to serve others. I want to be served. I want luxury. That desire is based on a love of self more than a love of others. The teaching reveals my diseased heart and I don't like that. It shows me what I really think and believe about other people. It attacks the real disease and reveals the sickness.
          Jesus says servanthood is a primary requirement for leadership. If you want to lead, you need to love those you are called to lead more than you love yourself. If you are in the workplace, it means you care for your people and don't use them. If you are in ministry, it means you care more about the well-being of your people than you do about growth or personal success. As a father, it means I am a servant-leader at home. My children do not exist to serve me, but I am there to look out for their best interest.
          As a Worship Pastor and lead worshipper, this means that I had better develop an addiction to serving behind the scenes; for the sake of the people I am leading as well as for the sake of my team. It also means that my artistic and music selections, while being true to my heart, primarily serve the congregation and not my own tastes and preferences. It means I stay focused on the mission of the church and the edification of the Bride rather than doing what I like to do.
          I believe we are called to be SERVANT leaders for two reasons; Primarily, for the blessing and betterment of the people we are called to lead. Secondarily, to set an example to those we lead. My kids learn to be servants when they watch me serve them and their mother.
         Step up folks. Step out. Seek out ways today of being a servant leader to those you are called to lead.
   

Worship Team Values

     Our values define us and direct our actions. If I value football, I'm gonna spend time watching and playing football. If I value time alone with God, I'm gonna have time quiet time set aside with the Lord. If I value friendships, I am going to work extra hard at being a good friend. 

     Our values as a worship team will also define how we operate and how we function. Most of the headaches that unfortunately plague worship teams come from a flawed value system. 

     So here are core values* I'd like to submit as the driving qualifications for someone wanting to be on the worship team. 

1) Authenticity- Your life off-stage. No one is perfect. And no one expects perfection. But we want to make sure that what are confessing matches how we live. 

2) Availability- Your time. Can you devote the time needed to practice, show up at rehearsal and be on time for a presentation? All the heart and talent doesn't mean a lot if a person is not able to be at the worship service. 

3) Attitude- Your heart. What is your motivation? Are you on the team because you like the spotlight? Do you just really love music? Or are you so dynamically in love with God that it overflows and you want lead others into His throne room. 

     I have found that stressful or difficult situations can show someone's true attitude. A good friend once told me, "the challenge is not in acting like a Christian, but in reacting like a Christian." How do you react when you don't get the solo? What if you are not asked to play as often as you like? How do you receive criticism? 

     Anyone can learn an instrument or to push buttons. But it takes a lifetime of working on your attitude. What matters is your trajectory. Are you aiming hard at developing a Christ-honoring attitude? 

4) Ability- your talent. Do you have the artistic and technical chops necessary to effectively lead a group of people in a way that is aesthetically pleasing and distraction free? Nothing is worse than jarring someone out of a transcendant moment with a wrong note. They happen, but it should be the exception to the norm. 

*(I need to confess that I flat out stole this from a dear friend : Bryan Nelson, Worship Director at a church in Topeka. He has been a long-time mentor and dear friend and "if it ain't broke, don't fix it". )

Pink Camo- Joy comes in the mourning

Last night was particularly difficult. Our house is 95% packed up. Just the last couple of items littering the house need to be thrown into a box. Tomorrow morning I am picking up the moving truck and we are loading it up. This last week has been a time of good-byes.

We love our home. We love our church. We love our family. We love our friends- and we are saying good-bye to all of it in order to follow God’s calling for us to missionaries in Frederick MD working with Grace Community Church.

I went to tuck my 6 year old daughter in bed. She is normally bubbly and quick to welcome me to tuck her in, but this time was different. She was hiding in her pink sleeping bag. Through some tender coaxing, I was able to get her to emerge and talk with me. After some small talk she locked eyes with me and her bottom lip started quivering. “Daddy, its just that I have to say good-bye to all my friends and all my family. I’m gonna miss ‘em Daddy.”

My heart sank. It broke. My little baby was hurt. I began crying along side her. Tears streamed down my face as she confessed her difficulty. I hugged her tightly as I held her- caccooned in her little pink camoflage sleeping bag.

I realized just how much I have asked her to give up over the last three years; living in three different houses and now onto our fourth- each time giving up a future with those friends. I cried with her and II prayed with her and offered her comfort from God’s faithfulness. What else can a daddy do?

I have a brave little girl. She did something that many Christians don’t do; she was honest with her pain. She was willing to cry out to her daddy and say “it hurts!”. She was willing to mourn. She was brave enough to make herself vulnerable. She was willing to cry. She didn’t dismiss it away thinking I am a Christian and Jesus should be everything I need and I shouldn’t feel that way.

I can look back over my life and see the many times I never really let myself mourn. People that passed away, friends that betrayed me, moving and leaving people that I love. All those things hurt, but I had some illusion that I am supposed to be stronger than that so I will not mourn. I will not be honest. I will not cry.

Abba, I repent of that. I want to be emotionally healthy and be honest with God and others about my pain. I will not hide behind illusions and facades of strength. I am willing to say “I am weak and God I need you. Daddy this hurts.” I will name the hurt and ask the Spirit of God to step in and be the Counselor, Comforter and Healer that He says He is. I will be willing to tell my Daddy that it hurts, that I hurt.








Its ok to hurt because God says that sorrow last only for a minute, but His joy comes in the morning. I would be willing to say that God’s joy comes in the mourning.

Freak Out. Big lesson on goodness.

So I need to make a confession. This is something that I've been working on (or perhaps God's been working on in me) for a long time now. Its something I confess, but I'm not real proud of it. 

I freak out. I get anxious. I worry. And I have come to realization that all my stress and anxiety and my major mode of operation  revolves around a core misbelief: 

I really don't believe that God is good all the time. 

I freak out because we don't have enough money. I freak out because the van needs repairs that we can't finance. I freak out because I don't see how we can sell our house. But ultimately, that stress, that "freaking out", is because I want to control the situation with my anxiety and because I don't really believe that God 1) has the ability the fix the problem 2) will be good to me. 

At its core, I have come to believe that the Christian life is about suffering and bad things as opposed to good things. It sounds almost ridiculous to say out loud like that, but that is my major assumption when coming up against difficulties, unknowns and bad times; that difficulty and suffering is par for the course. 

I read all these passages from the apostle Paul about suffering (1 Pet 3:17, Acts 9:16, 1 Pet 4:16, 2 Tim 2;3 they abound...). Suffering is anything that is painful or irritating. I come to believe that suffering is God's intention for us. Without realizing it, I have come to believe that God is in heaven pressing His heavenly thumb against us to cause suffering. Like a cruel kid frying ants with a magnifying glass. 

Any time he chooses to relent is a deviation to the plan and is the result of His grace and mercy in action. 

I mean, I know that God wants good for us - so He sent Jesus so we could get to heaven. Heaven is the good stuff. But until then.... suffering. 

I pray for God to relent and be good to me and my family. I call out on Him for his favor and for prosperity. I try to be really good and righteous; because, as everyone knows, the righteous people are the people that God is good to. Favor, prosperity and blessings come to either the really righteous (because they have earned God's favor) or the really pagan (because they have chosen to pursue the comforts and pleasures of this world and the flesh). I read through Romans 8 where is says that God works all things out for our good. But then again... we could just die and go to heaven and that is good right? Isn't that all we should expect out of this life?

I tell you that EVERY CRISIS OF FAITH IN MY LIFE IS ROOTED IN MY CORE DISBELIEF OF GOD'S GOODNESS. At my core, I stress out because i believe that God is not trustworthy. That His promises are NOT true, that he writes bad checks. 

God has been working real hard on me trying to break me of this misbelief. He has been unleashing His providence and blessings in awesome ways in the last 4 months. TIme after time he has been blessing our socks off. I could go on and on. 

We are just about getting ready to move to our new assignment in Maryland (Grace Community Church of Frederick). God has opened door after door-- in super-huge God-sized ways. I've been in tears after watching him move. But my faith is so weak- because at my core- i have a misbelief that God is not good. We have one last obstacle which is way out of our control, but would put a wrench in the whole move. I am doing my best not to "freak out"- but to simply trust in God- and know that 1) he is able and 2) he is good. 

Then God sent me this passage- a promise for me to claim. 

JEREMIAH 32:40-4140 I will make an everlasting covenant with them that I will not turn away from them, to do them good; and I will put the fear of Me in their hearts so that they will not turn away from Me. 41 I will rejoice over them to do them good and will [i]faithfully plant them in this land with all My heart and with all My soul.

Did you hear that? God says he's gonna do good to us. He rejoices to do good to us. He is intent on doing good to us and will do it with all His "heart and soul". There's not a lot of ambiguity there. There's not a lot of unclarity there (and for you dispensationalists- no...that's not just for the Jews at that time. It is a prophetic statement looking forward to the church and all redeemed believers). I know that if I tell my kids that I rejoice to do something good to them and that I will do it with all my heart and soul, then I truly mean it. 

So I am choosing to renew my mind. Confess my misbelief and ask God to put the Fear of Him in my heart so that I will not turn away from Him. 

Jeremiah 32:40-41 will be my battle cry.

(P.S.-- this song is awesome for all the reasons mentioned above. )

Lessons From Grace Part 3. Gasp

Lessons from Grace- Part 3

I've gained so much from my three years here at Grace Community Church in Goshen, IN. So I've been posting some of my biggest take-aways.

Part 1 was on a driving sense of calling and mission. Part 2 was about our unique calling to reach the men in our community. Part 3 is going to be on something that is borderline not-spiritual, but I think is very biblical and sadly all to absent in many Christian circles. Its the "F" word:

FUN. 

We flat out have fun here. I think when guests come to Grace, they can quickly see that we are not God's "frozen chosen". To quote a friend from Grace Community in MD, "we may be fluffy, but we ain't stuffy". 

There are so many negative examples of celebration within the world- alcohol abuse, provocative and sexual dancing, licentiousness and the like. Christian culture may have accepted the lie that we shouldn't dance or celebrate because we certainly don't want to be like that; because we don't want to be 'worldly'. Over the course of Christendom, church has started to look more like this: (pardon the gross characterization, but this is funny.)

Church, lets redeem celebration. A quick look at the stories in the Bible have tons of celebrations; The Israelites after crossing the Red Sea, David bringing the Ark of the Covenant back to Jerusalem. In fact, If anyone in the world has a reason to celebrate, its the Church-- the people who actually have hope to offer and a reason to rejoice. We should be first-class celebrators. 

There are certainly times to be sober and serious. Those times abound. But we are quick to celebrate when the occasion calls for it. Here are a couple of examples: 

•Baptism-- Its like a party here. People "whoop" and "holler" when they see the outward testimony of God's transforming power in the lives of their friends and family. We cheer after every person gets dunked. I've seen more baptisms here at this church than I have in all my 30 years of church-life combined and its awesome. I never tire of baptisms. Praise the Lord for how He redeems our junk and turns our ashes into beauty!

•Communion- (Gasp). I am a devoted and life-long Grace Brethren'r- and we love our communions-- foot washing and all (foot "warshing" from some areas of the country). What I love about Grace Community is that we deeply love remembering the cross with all sobriety-- but when it comes to looking forward to our hope of glory in heaven, we pull out the confetti, loud music, joyous dancing, balloons and really celebrate. I love the fact that my children get to see what biblical celebrations look like. Our communions are not for the faint of heart though-- they regularly go three hours. Just warning you. 

•Worship through singing and giving generously- We have no hesitation about being joyful and celebrating through our worship and giving. 

•Major holidays and celebrations- For our Easter celebration this year, we opened with a flash mob. It was a blast (both literally and figuratively). Was it very spiritual? Not really. Did it set the tone of anticipation and celebration for a day where we celebrate the New Life we have in Christ? I think so. Did it show our guests that this is a place where its ok to smile and have fun? I think so. Was it a blast for everyone who got to participate? Absolutely. 

• We threw a winter Luau celebration for our guests with special needs. There was absolutely nothing strategic about this. We weren't doing this to increase attendance or giving. We just wanted to show these valuable community members that Jesus loves them and so does Grace Community Church. It is one of the funnest things we do here (yes I said "funnest").

Lord, may your church regain its ability to celebrate with joy. May the world take notice of the hope we have. 

Our confetti machine is just about worn out; awesome.

LESSONS FROM GRACE PART 2

Lessons from Grace part 2.

I have had the privilege of seeing and being a part of many different churches across the nation. Some huge. Some small. It was God's purpose that we spend the last three years here at (the famous) Grace Community Church in Goshen, IN. This place is awesome. Here's another reason why;

Men's Ministry.

Most churches are geared for women; the messages are mild, the carpets are mauve and most of the service opportunities are in the nursery or on the decorating committee (and there's nothing wrong with that). They have a high value on security and gentle words rather than challenge and the heroic. Most men feeling completely disconnected (if they come at all).

Grace Community Church has recognized this trend and our focus on men has been a core part of our DNA. Our mantra is "You get the man, you get the family. You get the family, you get the community. You get the community, you get the world". We are intentional about targeting the men. As a result, this is a place where men feel challenged but not coddled. This is a place where men feel like they have the opportunity to be a part of something epic and heroic. Our men are challenged to fight for their Lord, their brothers, their daughters and their sons, their wives and their homes.

Evidence of this is littered all over the place.

•When you step into the lobbies, the decor is industrial rather than floral (as a matter of fact, the only time we have used flowers to decorate was for 3 weeks during a series for women called "Daughters") .

•We champion unusual and uncommon acts of courage, victory, accomplishment, drive, devotion and love.

•The worship and the messages are high-octane and full of challenges that cause men to rise to the occasion.

•The entire male staff competed in a 12 mile special ops obstacle race called "TOUGH MUDDER"- leading the way for other men to step up and take on the challenge as well.

•We regularly have epic service opportunities. One Sunday, we put out the call that we needed to send bikes to Chicago pronto and in three days our lobby was packed with bikes and we had to overload the truck.

•We have pioneered a ground breaking men's ministry called "FIGHT CLUB"

• Hundreds of men drive through the night to WILD AT HEART- a mountain in the Appalachians for two days of awesome fellowship and discipleship.

Recapturing biblical manhood and fatherhood is a core value of Grace Community Church- Just one of the reasons this place is awesome.

www.gracecommunity-church.com

Lessons from Grace- MISSION

Update from the Avey's

After spending three years as the media and tech director at Grace Community Church in Goshen, IN, we will be moving on. I accepted a Worship Pastor Position at Grace Community Church in Frederick, MD. We are very excited about the move.

Though honestly, the transition is bittersweet. We are excited for what God has ahead for us. But we are simultaneously saddened as we love the church here in Goshen.

I have learned so much here. I love the DNA, the mission and leadership here. I am so happy to be spring boarding into further ministry from this sending church.
I will start up a series of posts that I will affectionately call "Lessons from Grace"
Some lessons I have learned from Grace Community Church in Goshen IN and by watching the leadership here;

Part 1- MISSION

Mission is huge (Notice I didn't say "MISSIONS" in the sense of missionaries, but MISSION-- what drives you and what God is calling you to do). It creates focus and unity. It not only determines what you WILL do but also what you DON'T do. It determines where you spend your time, talents and treasures.

Nothing can stop a church that is on mission. And nothing can motivate a church that has no sense of mission. Each church has to figure out what God has called it to do. Nothing will have a bigger determination on the efficacyof a church more than 1) the blessing of the Holy Spirit and 2) it's mission.

Mission provides clarity. Clarity provides unity. Bitter in-fighting that is (unfortunately) so common in churches (particularly in the areas of music/worship) are diminished because I can put up with my exact desires not being met if I know that you will do anything in order to save my unsaved grandson, neighbor or friend.

There is a ton more to say about this, but for now, Grace Community Church is awesome at this.

Lord, help me bring this sense of mission with me to my next assignment.